Literally less than a week after I mustered up the courage to finally "retire" from my current career, something which took an incredible amount of faith, the rain started to fall. My personal computer died on me. The computer I use for my music, videos, writing, paying bills, and managing my finances. I thought ok well this sucks but you know what I've got savings! No worries I'll go find myself a new computer. Then the following day I get into a car accident which causes over $1,000 in damages. Insurance is a wonderful thing but with a $1,000 deductible it still left me another grand in the hole. I started to break down a bit. Why couldn't all of these things have happened when I knew I had a steady paycheck coming in every month. Why would my faith lead me to make sure a serious decision just to have everything start to collapse from underneath me? To clear my head I decided to get outside and take the dog for a walk. I leashed up my puppy and put my ipod on and started to stroll down the road. The first song Pandora rendered up for me started to play.
I was sure by now
God You would have reached down
And wiped our tears away
Stepped in and saved the day
But once again, I say "Amen", and it's still raining
As the thunder rolls
I barely hear Your whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
And as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise the God who gives
And takes away
I stopped dead in my tracks as a tear fell down my cheek. The only thing I could do was stop and pray. And you know what? When I opened my eyes I felt peace again. Complete peace.
Later that day I was out with a friend when I got a call from my insurance company. I still had to pay the $1,000 deductible but because this was the first accident I've ever been involved in I would receive "accident forgiveness" and my rates would not go up. This was an incredible blessing as I had worked out my "non working" budget for the following few months based on my current rate.
Not more than an hour later I received a text message from my dad saying that I could have my moms old computer if I wanted it. It's a bit prehistoric but it functions and that's all I needed right now.
Then once again, not more than an hour after I received the text message I got an email from the lady I was involved in the accident with. She thanked me for how responsible I was and how grateful she was that I took charge and got everything sorted with insurance. Apparently she had just moved here from Connecticut and was going through a very stressful time. It was a great reminder that despite the fact I was pretty angry with everything that happened kindness always wins. I could have been bitter and chewed her out. My life after all hasn't been a cakewalk either. But choosing to love instead of hate proved to be the right decision. It was a great reminder that you never know what is going on in someone else's life and showing or not showing compassion can make or break someone.
You might think the story stops here but it doesn't. That night I had a work send off dinner. I got in my car and headed down to Charlotte. I got stuck in a torrential down pour and ended up having to pull off the highway for a few minutes to avoid getting in yet another accident. I sat on the side of the road for a few minutes flipping through radio stations trying to find some music to jam out to. I had no luck finding music but I did stumble upon a station that was interviewing Dave Ramsey, a financial peace guru. I had taken his course the previous Spring. As I listened he talked about emergency funds, something I have faithfully built up over the last year and a half. It was a fantastic reminder that despite the fact I have some large bills piling up it's not going to be a problem for me. That's why we have emergency funds. They are for the times in which is seems to pour. They are a security blanket for when times are rough. They are the peace that comes when we get rocked financially. Once again thanks to that course God provided and everything was going to be ok.
Don't get me wrong. Like any normal human being I still feel frustrated, upset, and slightly worried. It's healthy to feel those things. But as I sat in my car and the rain began to let up I was reminded that every storm has an ending. You just need to have the faith to believe it will stop. I truly believe this all was a test of faith. We were never promised life would be easy but as long as we remain faithful we will be taken care of as we journey through life.
And I'll praise You in this storm
And I will lift my hands
For You are who You are
No matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
I'm not quite sure where my quarter life crisis will be leading me but I trust my journey will end with a brilliant rainbow when I reach my destination.
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